Just cut and paste the authors name to find the rest of that persons quotes



FUNNY RELIGIOUS QUOTES



"If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false
pretences."
-- William Sunday.

"I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an
album."
-- Rita Rudner.

"Thank God I'm an atheist."
-- Luis Bunuel.

"The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper
with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as
I ever tasted."
-- Brendan Behan.

"In the begining there was nothing and God said 'Let there be light', and there was
still nothing but everybody could see it."
-- Dave Thomas.

"Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much
more comfortable."
-- HG Wells.

"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?"
-- George Deacon.

"I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear."
-- Woody Allen.

"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that
the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."
-- Emo Philips.

"When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the
audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the
Protestants in whom you don't believe?"
-- Quentin Crisp.





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