Just cut and paste the authors name to find the rest of that persons quotes
Funny Lawyer and Money Quotes
"Make crime pay. Become a Lawyer."
-- Will Rogers.
"I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of
-- Peter Cook.
"The only difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying
in the road is that there are skid marks around the skunk."
-- Patrick Murray.
"A lawyer with a briefcase can steal more than a thousand men with guns."
-- Mario Puzo.
"A lawyer is a learned gentleman who rescues your estate from your enemies and
keeps it to himself."
-- Henry Bougham.
"The most beautiful words in the English langauge are 'not guilty'."
-- Maxim Gorky.
"To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily
-- John Mortimer.
"There are three reasons why lawyers are replacing rats as laboratory research
animals. One is that they are plentiful, another is that lab assistants don't get so
attached to them and the third is that they will do things that you just can't get rats
-- Blanche Knott.
"The Scottish verdict 'not proven' means 'guilty, but don't do it again'."
-- Winifred Duke.
"I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to
be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know
who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?"
-- Paul Merton.